Posts Tagged ‘newborns’

Germs

Friday, January 16th, 2015

From Friday Mom – Erin:
Our first week at home with baby Charlotte has been an eventful one.  So far this week, Rory’s daycare has had two weather-related two-hour delayed openings, meaning that I’ve had to take him in because his dad was already at work.  I have been to the pediatrician once with each child, and Rory has stayed home twice from school with a mild fever and strong cough.  Rory’s daddy has been sleeping on the couch most nights to avoid waking the baby up with his piercing cough.  My mother, who has generously agreed to spend a few weeks with us to help out with the new baby, has been helping disinfect and run interference for germs.

We’ve been dividing and conquering to keep the kids as separate as possible in hopes of keeping Charlotte away from whatever delightful virus has stricken Rory and his father.  So far, Rory has been reasonably cooperative in staying away from his little sister.  We’ve had to tell him a little white lie– rather than explain that he is sick and can’t be close to her, we’ve told him that she is sick and that we don’t want him to catch her germs.

Having two kids born in January comes with a certain number of perils– namely: cold weather and lots of germs.  When Rory was born, it was pretty easy to keep him from most infection vectors.  We didn’t really allow anyone who wasn’t perfectly healthy into the house to visit, and we barely left the house for those first few months. Now that Rory is in daycare (and remaining there during the duration of my maternity leave), it is substantially harder to keep the germs from entering the house.  Plus, with an antsy toddler, it is a virtual certainty that we’ll be heading out into public far more often with Charlotte than we did with her brother.

All of this begs the question– is it truly possible to protect our young daughter from her brother’s germs?  Probably not.  Instead, we’ll work on doing the best we can and hope that we can at least defer her first cold for a few more weeks.  Fingers crossed.  Tightly.

Party Time?

Monday, May 23rd, 2011

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
This weekend, I am attending the engagement party of a close family friend. I know that I am welcome to bring Haley to this event, the question is: Should I?

I would love to show off my new baby (around 7 weeks old) to all of my friends. My parents and husband will be there, so I will have plenty of help—it won’t just be me carrying her around non-stop. And I am starting to realize that with breastfeeding, it is always much easier to have her in close proximity to me, rather than coordinate the circus of timing feedings, my departure from and arrival back home, and pumping so that she will have the sufficient number of bottles. If Haley goes to the party, I will get to dress her up in something really cute, too!

If I don’t take Haley, my husband will stay home with her. He’d prefer to watch sports on TV, frankly, so he wouldn’t mind missing the party in the least. However, he hasn’t yet been alone with her for an extended period of time, with all of the responsibility on him. Perhaps that’s all the more reason that he should do it. If I bring her to the party, she may be fussy and cry. It will probably be really hard to make sure no one touches her. People are dumb, and they can’t resist a baby, unfortunately. Many of these folks are older “family friends,” and they may be easily offended. (Not that I really care, but my mom might.)

Her pediatrician said the right time to first take a baby out around crowds is 6 to 8 weeks, so I know Haley is ready. But am I? So far, we have had the occasional outing to a store or two. For the most part, she has been closely guarded at home. I am not a person who thinks barricading children from potential germs is the best way to keep them from being sick. In fact, I strongly believe in the opposite effect. So what’s stopping me?

Whether Haley attends the party or not, there surely will be many more in her future. Sooner or later, she will get to dress up, visit with folks, and be the belle of the ball. Her social life will start whether I am ready for it or not. I guess now is as good of a time as any.

This Too Shall Pass

Monday, April 25th, 2011

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
You hear a lot about how life with a newborn is hard. And it is. For me, it is difficult in a way that I couldn’t have predicted. I thought it would be more inexplicable crying (and perhaps that is coming at some point- yikes!) and feeling totally clueless about what to do for your child. Luckily, it’s not really like that. There are enough resources out there so that if you put any effort into educating yourself, listening to your own instincts, and paying attention to what your pediatrician says, you should more or less know what to do. That doesn’t mean it’s easy.

Haley is almost three weeks old and she is the sweetest, loveliest little girl. And she’s also a bit of a terrorist. Her expertise is in an area known as sleep torture. She and I are both learning how to make breastfeeding work. The standard for young babies is to feed every 2 to 3 hours, for about 20 to 30 minutes at a time. Sound like a lot? That would be a relaxing night for me. That has not been our reality. It’s more like, ‘Mom, I think I’m going to be hungry and wake up whenever I feel like it. As often as I feel like it. I am going to feed for as long as I want. Take breaks during the feeding for as long as I want. Fall asleep and then cry hysterically minutes later because—surprise – I wasn’t actually finished with my meal. And here’s the kicker. I’m going to feed in such a way that leaves you unsure if I’m getting adequate nutrition, because I feel you need more excitement in your life.’

I have sought sympathy from my mom friends about this, and they assure me my woes are typical. This too shall pass, they say, and faster than I realize. I think that’s the most annoying thing about newborn baby issues. I spend so much time worrying about things, that I’m not appreciating every minute to the fullest. I know she won’t be this age forever. But being a new mom is an emotional time, and I think worry tends to outweigh sheer joy, when it should probably be the other way around. It’s hard to be blissful when you are concerned that your baby is not thriving.

It’s important to keep things in perspective, though. In actuality, my baby is doing great. Far too many parents are not that lucky. I know that, but I can’t seem to stop myself from being worked into a constant, heightened state of concern. Soon enough, I will surely be dealing with new parenting dilemmas that have absolutely nothing to do with feeding. This issue will pass indeed. But the anxiety that comes with being a parent never will. At times, I wonder what I got myself into. Then I’ll have a moment in which I forget to be worried, and I stare with wonder at the miracle I’ve created. And suddenly, all is right in my world, and I know everything will be okay. New problems will always be there, but so will the love I have for my daughter. I have faith that it can get me through anything.

I’m a Mom! (For real this time.)

Monday, April 11th, 2011

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
As you may have heard, my husband and I welcomed our beautiful baby into the world last week. We didn’t know what gender we were having beforehand. Everyone said I was having a boy. I had that classic “boy carry”—a tight basketball shape sitting high on my belly. Of course, it’s a girl.

And I couldn’t be happier. When the doctor put her on my chest, I was stunned. My husband cried a little, but I was just in shock. As they took her aside to check her out and clean her up, I turned my head and strained to look at her and process what was happening. I was loopy from the delivery and I just kept saying to my husband, “I love her. I love her. I love her.”

We were undecided on names, especially for a girl. But that was silly, because it seems like she came with a name, somehow—Haley.

These days, Haley is really into sleeping, feeding and screaming. Her grandparents like to talk about how feisty she is, how she does what she wants, how smart and athletic she’ll be. Perhaps that’s all true, but I’m very cognizant of the fact that she’s only few days old, and her personality will continue to develop. It’s not that I’m against fawning over her and talking about how perfect she is, because she is. Yet I feel as her mother, my role is to take her as she comes. And I won’t want to put any of my perceptions on her.

All I need to do is make sure that she has every opportunity to thrive, and that she knows how much we love her. I may not be the perfect mother, but I will always try to be, because that is what Haley deserves.