Play-Learn-Grow-Repeat

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
Over the years, my children have been very curious about the rules of the road.  They frequently ask questions about driving, road signs, turn signals, and parts of a vehicle. When Jack was a bit younger, he would always find it fascinating how quickly we could go and how quickly we could stop.  He would ask questions like; “What makes the clicking sound when we turn?” ”What makes us go faster?” “Is gasoline like food for the van?” Perhaps we have an engineer on our hands.

Tate is also extremely curious when riding in the car.  However, he is more concerned with road signs and whether or not I fully stopped at a stop sign.  When he was a toddler he used to shout, “Go” when he’d see the traffic light turn green.  At first I thought it was hysterical, but now he is quite the back seat driver.  Maybe I need to get him is own steering wheel for the car.

To this day, Tate still announces when the light turns green.  He gets very confused when I stop at a red light, but then proceed to turn right.  He is starting to read/memorize a few road signs and asks why it’s placed along side of the road.  It’s quite comical hearing his backseat commentary on our way home from school or anywhere we go for that matter – especially when he thinks I’m speeding.

I’m hoping their love for car/road knowledge continues until it’s their turn to sit behind the wheel.  I hope the knowledge they absorb now will make them smart and safe drivers in the future.

.

From Friday Mom – Erin:
I am writing this week’s blog from 30,000 feet over the plains en route to California for a brief, five-day mini-vacation with my husband.  It is our first extended trip away from Rory since he was born, though it has been on our calendars since Rory was only a few weeks old.  One of my husband’s dearest and closest childhood friends is getting married next to a mountain in the northwest part of the state tomorrow, and we opted extend the trip and fly solo for a few days.  We were able to accomplish this with the generous help of my mother and father, who kindly agreed to watch the kiddo for us while we were away.

I feel guilty admitting that when we first booked the trip in mid-February–when the nights were still short and interrupted, and when “routine” was not part of our lexicon– the thought of getting away from Rory for a few days seemed utterly divine.  In those early weeks, when the self-doubt was overwhelming and the anxiety of trying not to screw this whole parenting thing up too badly was in its rawest form, it was pretty easy to click “purchase” and book airfare for two.

However, in the week or so leading up to our departure, I felt myself wishing we had figured out a way to bring him with us.  Setting aside the hassle of packing for two separate trips and trying to pass along all the requisite instructions, I was simply sad to be leaving him behind.  As I sit here watching the new mom a few rows up struggle through the five-hour flight, I am feeling a little better about our choice. But, that doesn’t change the fact that being away from Rory is a great deal harder than I’d originally imagined.  He is at an age now where things change exponentially each day.  Last Friday night, he started crawling.  By Monday, he was apparently tearing across the room at daycare, pulling out toys from their storage areas, and exploring all the added benefits (and dangers) of his new-found mobility.  I’m curious to see what new milestone we miss while we are gone. Perhaps we’ll be greeted with cries of “mama” and “dada” upon our return. . .

As much as I know we both need some time away to focus on the relationship that brought this little wonder into the world, I have fallen hard for the little guy.  For the past few months, we have spent nearly every moment that we are not working spending time with him, and it feels odd to be going away without the third member or our tiny family.  Sure, our dancing shoes may still work just fine, and of course we cannot wait to celebrate with our friends; but, there is an equal though different excitement about our return trip home.   And it is in moments like this that the old adage “your life will never be the same” rings true once again.

From Friday Mom – Erin:
Last weekend we packed up our car and headed out of town for a long 4th of July weekend. Rory had a great time visiting with new people and trying his first swim in the pool. He did not, however, enjoy having his schedule disrupted.

In some ways, his inflexibility is probably a problem of my own making. I have been pretty strict about trying to keep some semblance of a daily schedule since he was around four months old. This has helped give some modicum of predictability to the ever-changing adventure of raising an infant. But it also means that neither one of us is particularly good at adapting when things are thrown off.

For example, we timed our trip to coincide with his morning nap-time. I thought this was a brilliant move on my part, given that he slept nearly the entire trip for the two prior car trips he has taken. But, rather than snooze the entire way, he stared at me with those baby blues the majority of our two-hour drive. He was fussy when we arrived and he stayed that way until he finally went down for his afternoon nap.

Then, the next day, we missed his afternoon nap almost altogether because we had a party to attend during that time. We tried to get him to snooze in the car again; still no luck. To top things off, he also woke up more frequently at night, meaning that none of us were particularly well-rested by the end of our stay.

I am learning (albeit slowly) that traveling with an infant sometimes means that the only certainty is that nothing is certain. Fortunately, Rory remained his generally happy self for the majority of the trip (with the exception of a few overly-tired melt downs). So I guess I should simply consider myself lucky and get over it.

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
Yesterday, my husband Joe left on a business trip. He’s a three hour plane ride away. The conference he’s attending– and his firm is running– is three days long. Obviously this is not that long a period of time. When I was a working woman, I traveled a lot. I’d be away all week or if the project required it, for months at a time. Of course, I was single then so it didn’t matter in the sense that wherever I was working was right where I wanted to be. Joe, on the other hand, would rather be home with his family. And that’s where we wish he was too.

I hate when Joe’s away because Haley misses him, I miss his help with Haley and around the house, and most of all, I just like having him here to talk to. Anyone who’s been in a relationship knows what I’m talking about. Your partner is your person. There to listen to every detail of your day, no matter how meaningless. There to be a sounding board for new ideas, a support system for frustrations. When you are accustomed to being in a rhythm with someone, you miss hearing their thoughts as much as you miss sharing your own. Sometimes I can’t bring myself to make a decision for Haley unless I say it out loud to Joe first.

Fortunately, our world is more connected than ever and through text, email, and calling, Joe and I can be in constant communication. By the way, I’m completely discounting what’s really hard here– the difficulty of being a single parent for a few days– because my parents are helping me out with Haley. And I realize that missing a husband for half a week is in no sense a big deal. I would never want to minimize the kind of sacrifice and strength it takes to be a military wife like Wednesday Mom.

The brightest spot of this business trip is that I arranged to meet Joe in a few days close to his sunny destination! We are having a quick trip, just the two of us, to celebrate our upcoming five year anniversary. Then, we’ll be able to make up for this lost time.

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
Last week our family traveled up north to visit with our extended families.  Since it was a brief visit, we decided to fly and make a total adventure out of it.  Jack and Tate had both been on airplanes before, but this was the first time Tate could really get a sense of what it was like to fly.  Although Tate had a few setbacks while traveling, both boys did very well for being constrained in a seat for two and a half hours.  Tate loved to look out the window and find swimming pools or “little blue dots.”  He also thought the clouds looked like marshmallows.  Opening and closing the window shade kept him entertained for awhile.  Luckily, our flight was very light and no one sat near us to hear the plastic on the shade going up and down.  I was willing to deal with any sort of noise as long as it kept him entertained.

At long last we met our new nephew/cousin on our visit.  He is such a sweet little guy.  The boys liked meeting him and playing with him.  I liked holding him and watching him smile and talk.  We celebrated his baptism and are thrilled to have him as our godson.  Jack and Tate were able to spend lots of time with their aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents.

While we were in PA, my family organized a large party to celebrate my grandmother’s 90th birthday. My grandmother’s family and friends also attended the party and I visited a lot of people I haven’t seen in decades.  Jack and Tate met a lot of their extended family as well.  I was happy to hug my grandmother on her actual 90th birthday and be there in person to celebrate such a wonderful milestone in her life.

The trip was short but we made the most of limited time. We couldn’t have fit another family activity in if we tried. Our return trip was a long day but we made it back to our home safe and sound.

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
We are currently wrapping up a lovely vacation in the American South. We ventured down here to see my in-laws, and we’ve had a wonderful time. There was nothing major on the agenda—which I think makes for the best vacations—except for resting, reading and bonding. We picked the perfect time to go. It’s been balmy and sunny here while the Northeast is somehow still getting snow.

Haley had a great time hanging out with her grandparents. Her favorite activity was going outside. She fed the fish in the lake (while chomping on some of the bread herself—a girl’s got to eat, after all), played with her ball and bubbles, and repeatedly threw her Baby Doll and Elmo into the briar patch; don’t ask me why. Haley is really an active, outdoors kid, so it gives me pleasure to see her in her element in the midst of such a long and unforgiving winter.

Before we know it the weather will turn warm. I’m sure days when it’s too hot to go out are fast approaching. I have my fingers crossed that we get some temperate spring days in New York. If not, we may just have to head out on another vacation.

From Friday Mom – Jaime:
I remember growing up that my parents took us to Disney often.  We would usually go (like the rest of the world) over that week between Christmas and New Years while school was closed.  We’d pair it with a visit to see my grandma, spending part of the week with her and the rest of the week down in Orlando.  I loved it.

After the past couple days, I have a whole new appreciation for what my parents must have gone through taking me and my sister there…

We took Andrew to Disneyland for the first time this week.  He was so excited to see Mickey and Minnie.  To go somewhere new. To ride the rides.  To try and get selected for Jedi training.

We spent the first day over in the California Adventure, where Carsland resides.  It was cool.  Andrew loved it.  He managed to sit (mostly) still for a parade.  He cried because he couldn’t do the Radiator Springs Racers, but we promised there would be time to do what he wanted the next day.  To be honest, he held it together well that first day.

The second day, when we cruised around Disneyland’s main park, was a totally different story.  We got there when it opened at 10. We didn’t bring Andrew back to the hotel for a nap.  He insisted he didn’t need one.  We probably shouldn’t have listened to him.

He bawled when he didn’t get picked to do Jedi training. (I was disappointed too – the Jedi master chose every kid around him, except for Andrew.)  He stomped his feet and pouted when we told him he was running off too far ahead of us.  He growled at us when we didn’t do what he wanted to do the second he wanted to do it.  He threw a full blown temper tantrum because I didn’t want to carry a stuffed animal around the park all day, but promised to buy him something later in the day.  I have never seen this kid flip out so badly as when he managed to spit not one, but two, Starbursts out of his mouth and I wouldn’t let him have another one.

But as he was freaking out over nothing, I looked around at some of the other parents.  A guy waiting to take his kids on the Dumbo ride practically had to take a flying leap to catch his daughter before she fell off the wall she was walking on.  A mom got so pissed off at her kid that she stomped out of line and walked away from her daughter completely.  Kids on leashes were trying to attach their tethers to other kids.  Tears flowed freely.  Parents’ angers ran high while patience reached an all time low.

It made me feel a silent sense of camaraderie with the other parents, as well as overwhelming joy in the moments when MY kid was behaving well and other parents’ children weren’t.

There probably was a better way to do Disney.  Like with naps. Like planning it out better and doing what the books suggest – don’t hit the stuff closest to the gate the second you walk in.  Don’t jump on the rides with no wait times immediately – go to the stuff you need FastPasses for and hop on a line.  They’re just going to get worse as the day rolls on… Like asking when the characters go on break.  After Andrew lost it completely when he failed to be able to see Donald, Chip or Dale because “the line closed,” a very nice park worker told us when the characters took their breaks and that the lines to see them closed 10 minutes before break time.  That small, yet key, piece of knowledge, created a far better experience for all of us and landed Andrew some solid time with the characters!

Vacations with kids are tough.  Traveling can be difficult. Keeping them occupied on a long car ride, or flight, is challenging.  But tackling what is supposedly the happiest place on earth?  We all should get hazard pay for that one.

It’s almost enough to make you wonder why in the world you’d go back again after a day’s worth of tears, temper tantrums and failure to listen.  But when you look back on the trip, from the comfort of your couch after you’ve returned home and the blisters on your feet from walking around all day for several days in a row have started to heal, you remember the look on your son’s (or daughter’s) face the first time they saw Cinderella’s castle.  Or that expression of total awe as he looks up at Mickey Mouse.  Or how he grabbed your hand excitedly, trying to drag you to forward faster than his feet will really carry him, just so he can bring you on a favorite ride ONE MORE TIME before the park closes because he has to share the experience with you…

And thinking back on THOSE moments, you know you’re going to go again.  Because anything that makes him THAT happy…it has to be worth it, right?

From Friday Mom – Jaime:
Have you ever seen the movie “Sweet Home Alabama”? There was a scene in the movie where Reese Witherspoon is out drinking when she runs into an old friend. She gets this stunned expression on her face and says “Look at you. You have a baby. In a bar.”

I feel like people have been giving me the same kind of looks when they heard that I was bringing Andrew with me to New Orleans. Okay…so when you think of NOLA, you think of Bourbon Street. The bars. Mardi Gras. The strip clubs.

Having just been here in February, right before the start of Mardi Gras, I was a bit apprehensive about this too. But then I reminded myself that Andrew has been going to Vegas since he was 7 months old – and that doesn’t seem like an overly kid-friendly city at first glance either.

Last night we walked around the city. It was before dark, so before things good too loud and rowdy. We cruised down Bourbon Street with Andrew. He thought it was awesome seeing all the people, the ones dressed in crazy costumes, the beads, the impromptu parade that went by and especially the music. He was standing in the middle of the street shaking it, getting all into the really loud and only marginally okay band that was playing at the bar.

Today we went to the aquarium. We’ve taken him to some great restaurants and even my picky eater seems to be getting into the local fare. He’s not eating much of it, but he’s eagerly inspecting our plates and asking to try whatever looks appealing to him. (Don’t knock it. This is a major victory that my child asked to eat shrimp and pineapple. Not together. But still… It’s even a major victory that he was willing to eat a peanut butter sandwich for lunch instead of his standbys – mac and cheese and chicken nuggets.)

I think tomorrow we’re going to hit the zoo and the insectarium. Oh yeah. You read that right. Me in a place full of bugs. And rumor has it there’s even a kitchen where they create all kinds of bug-filled recipes. Like meal worm salsa, cricket banana fritters and other truly lovely (scary) sounding delights. (I don’t think either one of us will be sampling the delicacies) I also promised my little guy a trip to the movies. Ice Age 3 comes out tomorrow.

Most cities have stuff you can do with kids that’s fun and age appropriate, even if at first glance it seems like they will be impossible to find. Just stay off Bourbon Street after dark with them 😉

Have a great weekend everyone.

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
My husband’s family is not centrally located.  His parents live in Pennsylvania and his grandmother lives in Vermont.  She is elderly and can no longer travel.  As a child, he saw her a couple times a year, but as an adult, he has only seen her once every two or three years.  In fact, she has never met our youngest son, Tate.

We decided it was time for our family to make a long overdue trip to Vermont. We wanted our children to see and experience a part of the country they’ve never seen and a relative they’ve never met.  We packed up the van and made the day’s drive.  Jack and Tate’s great grandmother eagerly anticipated our arrival.  We were greeted with beautiful weather and crisp New England air that was a relief after living in Mississippi for so long.

The years have slowed my husband’s grandmother physically, but she is mentally sharp and very smart. The boys took to her immediately and especially to her young puppy. We made several visits to see her over the course of our brief visit.  We made the most of our time together including, dinners out, the park, a stop at the confectionery and lots of puppy playtime.

The boys were surprisingly aware that we couldn’t run and be noisy everywhere due to the elderly folks all around.  It was sweet to see Jack hold doors open for his great grandmother.  The boys asked lots of questions about old pictures and learned some fun songs she used to teach their daddy when he was little. We took lots of pictures and will remember all the fun moments we shared together.

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
We are taking a trip in about two months. We are going to be flying—possibly with a layover, renting a car, and staying somewhere we’ve never been. Haley will be about 13 months by then. I am very nervous about how all of this is going to go!

We’ve flown with Haley twice so far, once when she was 4 months and again when she was 8 months. Both trips went fine. She didn’t cry much, and the trick to getting her settled was lots and lots of nursing. However, Haley is a totally different person now. First, she’s a full-blown toddler who is extremely active. Second, I don’t think breastfeeding will be a magical solution any longer. I’m hoping she’ll be partly weaned by our trip, but even if she partakes in a nursing session, she won’t be a sleepy baby afterward—more like a replenished crazy person.

There has been a lot of in the news lately about families with young children getting kicked off planes. I hope we won’t come close to being in that kind of situation. While it’s imperative that a captain feel safe and secure about operating an aircraft, and has the right to remove any passenger, I feel for those parents. You never know what can set off a young child. The adults might not have handled the situations well—it’s hard to know if you weren’t there. But it is annoying to hear these people have had to pay to get on new flights. Air travel just isn’t what it used to be!

As Haley is coming into her own more and more, I’m wondering how much influence we have over her personality and how much comes from within. I’m starting to think it’s mostly the latter. So far, she’s mischievous, funny and stubborn—though it’s tiring to deal with, I love her for it. I’m hopeful that as she matures that she’ll also be kind and polite… and a considerate traveler.