Play-Learn-Grow-Repeat

From Monday Mom – Neetika:

I can’t be the only one.

I can’t be the only one who drives with a screaming child in the car seat. Any mom or dad who has been in the car for upwards of half an hour with a baby, rear facing, in the car seat, knows the dread I am talking about. It’s the feeling you get when your child is crying hysterically, you can’t clearly see him, it makes no sense to stop, and worst of all… you will not be there soon.

Usually I plan longer car trips for Hudson’s naptime so that at some point, he’ll conk out and have some energy for our destination. It didn’t work out that way yesterday. He took two good naps and then our schedule put us on the go. The mercurial nature of NYC stop-and-go traffic was the cherry on the sundae. It’s annoying enough to be delayed in your travels; listening to your baby wail and having no way to comfort him is torturous. What I’ll never understand is how Haley slept soundly through the whole thing!

When people talk about being glad the baby years are over, I think they are reminiscing about moments like this. Being a parent is always difficult, but there is something particularly grating about not being able to communicate with your child. You can’t explain what twenty more minutes is (an episode length of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse), and you can’t bribe with treats or toys. There is so alleviating the despair. Sometimes, you just have to be in the car. That’s life. But at least mom and dad can shower you with hugs and kisses just as soon as the destination is reached…whenever the heck that may be!

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
After two wonderful months visiting PA, we packed up the van and headed south back to our home in Mississippi. Before arriving home we made a quick beach visit to see our friends who just moved there. They were still waiting for their movers to deliver their home goods. We all slept on air mattresses and ate on paper plates, but we didn’t mind at all. It was nice to enjoy one last family vacation, and a chance to visit with friends whom we haven’t seen in a couple years. We enjoyed the nearby beach and their backyard pool. We left sunny Florida and drove our last leg of our return trip to Mississippi dreaming about sleeping in our own beds for the first time in several weeks.

While on our last leg of the drive, a logging truck kicked up a large rock that shattered our windshield. It is an expensive annoyance, but ultimately something we could have replaced. When we finally got home, we pulled into our driveway and inspected how bad the windshield was. After over 16 hours of driving we walked into our home, carrying a vanload of bags, bikes and luggage, only to discover that our air conditioner was dead. It is August in Mississippi and we have near record temperatures flirting with 100 degrees and 100% humidity. Our home thermostat read 90 degrees. At this point, we were tired, hungry and ready to fall on the couch for a nice afternoon nap, but instead we were scrambling to find a company that provided HVAC service on a Sunday afternoon. Ultimately, we had to spend the night with friends. It took two repairmen, two days, and nearly $1,000 to fix the system. Last night we finally got to sleep in our own beds for the first time in months. Our kids slept until 8am. That is a record for our early-risers.

Our life is finally getting back to “normal,” and I am trying to get the boys into our daily routine. Looking back on the last few horrible days, I can only pat my kids on the back for their flexibility on handling the situation. They were happy to take a few toys to a friend’s house and entertain themselves. They played with plastic cups and paper plates. They assured me our house would be ok. I know the problems we dealt with are pretty small compared with some other people face around the world. I try to tell myself this over and over again. Life is full of curve balls. I can only hope to teach my children that life isn’t easy; but you can always adapt and overcome.

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
I can assure you this is probably the most random blog post you’ll read today or maybe even this week. Our younger son, Tate, has a weird aversion to wearing clothing with buttons on it. It started a while ago when he would turn down pants with buttons on the side or a polo shirt with three buttons on the front. I didn’t think much of it, because his strong willed personality tends to take over when something doesn’t go his way. I know kids go through phases with everything in life. For example, Tate’s older brother disliked wearing jeans, but quickly got over it when they kept his legs warm during winter months.

Over time, it’s become quite the struggle to watch Tate get dressed in the morning. Most “nicer” clothes have buttons on them. There is no chance of avoiding outbursts when dressing Tate in a button-down shirt. I get so frustrated on school picture day, church, and other times I want to dress him up. Our morning routine is now an additional fifteen minutes because we have to negotiate his outfit. It seems a little ridiculous to me.

Over the holidays, we had some play dates with Tate’s friends. I brought up the issue with another mom and she mentioned that she was going through the same battle with her son. What is it with buttons? I think Tate rejects buttons because they are challenging for him to handle. I help button his shirt buttons, but he likes his pants that close with a snap, so much easier for him to do on his own.

Whatever the button issue is, I hope Tate quickly learns that a lot of clothing has buttons on it, and that’s just the way it is. In fact, next year, Tate is required to wear school uniforms and he’ll be wearing buttons everyday. I searched Amazon for a book on buttons and found one about “Pete the Cat and his four groovy buttons.” We’ve been reading that book over and over hoping Tate understands how “cool” buttons are. Can you tell I’m getting desperate?   Again, I’m hoping this is a quick phase and it passes rather quickly.

From Monday Mom – Neetika:
My Haley is definitely a handful. I love that she is spunky and independent for her age, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to deal with. Lately Haley has been asserting herself in quite an inconvenient way—by refusing the stroller. She wants to walk. It’s very stressful and cumbersome to get out of the apartment and negotiate the city streets when she won’t sit in the stroller. What’s worse is that she does not want to be carried and does not want to hold my hand.

Out on the street. In New York City. Yeah.

Not so good for a small toddler. I must maintain full focus to keep her on the inside track of the sidewalk. If we approach a busy street or find ourselves surrounded by pedestrians, I pick her up whether she likes it or not. It takes massive strength (for me) to keep her in my arms.

Curiously, she goes out with Dad without a problem! She loves holding his hand or being carried by him. She may resist the stroller with him too, but eventually she’ll acquiesce. She gives Mama a much harder time.

Haley isn’t always ready to break free. Sometimes she needs her mother and cannot be settled down by anything else. After bath time, before bed, during wake-ups, and first thing in the morning, she wants her mother and you better not stand in her way. Those are the only times she wants to cuddle with me. If I go in for a hug when she’s not in the mood for one, there’s a fair chance that I’m risking physical injury.

Being a parent not only takes patience and mental endurance—it’s physically demanding too! Often I’m downright sore from dealing with Haley’s antics by the end of the day. I know that she’s particularly challenging with me because I’m the person she trusts the most. Testing her boundaries is a crucial part of her development. I’m learning to pick my battles. My strategy is to her explore, keep her safe, and wear my good sneakers.

From Wednesday Mom – Janelle:
Raising two boys is a blessing.  Raising two boys who are progressively antagonizing each other more and more is not so much a blessing.  Jack has always been pretty laid back, cautious, and for the most part well behaved, though he does have his moments.  Tate, on the other hand, is throwing Mommy and Daddy for a loop.  He is quickly learning to master the tricky child syndrome.

I know comparing children, more specifically siblings, isn’t recommended, but Jack is all I know.  I remember what disciplinary actions we took and were successful with.  Imitating those same actions with Tate doesn’t seem to be working.  He is very strong willed and wants to do things the way he wants them done.  For example, if we speak firmly with him he thinks it’s funny.  A timeout isn’t understood yet.  Speaking to him nicely and trying to explain why we can’t twist and turn during a diaper change takes A LOT of patience.  The latest trick he performs is pulling all the ornaments off the Christmas tree and hiding them.

Tate can be incredibly sweet or incredibly destructive depending on his mood, nap schedule and phase of the moon. What he lacks in consistency he makes up for with personality. We are getting to know our youngest and we love him even if he is a bit of a challenge. Hopefully we can bring out the sweet side and help control his temper.